10月ぐらいに風邪を引いて、そのことを英作文にして添削していただきました。なぜ今頃それを持ち出したかというと、また同じような風邪を引いてしまい、それで思い出しました…。
まずは日本語
5日前から風邪を引いている。熱はないけど、喉が痛くてしんどい。お医者さんに診てもらったら症状としてはウイルスが原因の喉の痛みだけだけど、風邪と診断されていくつか抗生物質を処方してもらった。最近職場でも私用でもちょっとした出来事があって疲れていたのかも。幸い今のところ仕事を休んではないけど、2日間の休みを休養にあてないといけない。だけど今日は調子が良くなって来てるので、ちょっとドライブにでも行こうかと思っている。最近雨の日が多かったけど、今日は快晴だから。 |
提出した英作文
I’ve been (A_)caught a cold(_A) since 5days ago. I haven’t had a fever, but have had a sore throat and have felt tired. I went to see a doctor, and was diagnosed (B)a cold that the symptom was just sore throat that caused of viruses. (C_)I was(_C) prescribed some antibiotics. I had done some event:at work, and private, lately. I was possibly tired. Luckily, I didn’t need to take off work (D)with it so far, (E)I need to take a rest during my two day off. Still, I’m getting better today, (F)I’m thinking about going to drive just a little. It’s been rainy almost everyday lately. Meanwhile, it’s a precious sunny day. |
添削結果
I’ve been (A_)sick(_A) since 5days ago. I haven’t had a fever, but have had a sore throat and have felt tired. I went to see a doctor, and was diagnosed (B)as a cold that the symptom was just sore throat that caused of viruses. (C_)He(_C) prescribed some antibiotics. I had done some event:at work, and private, lately. I was possibly tired. Luckily, I didn’t need to take off work (D)because of it so far, (E)so I need to take a rest during my two day off. Still, I’m getting better today, (F)and I’m thinking about going to drive just a little. It’s been rainy almost everyday lately. Meanwhile, it’s a precious sunny day. |
解説
(A)時制 (B)表現の仕方 (C)主語 (D)代替表現 (E)接続詞 (F)接続詞 |
自分なりに見やすく編集
I’ve been (A_)caught a cold(_A) since 5days ago. I haven’t had a fever, but have had a sore throat and have felt tired. I went to see a doctor, and was diagnosed (B)a cold that the symptom was just sore throat that caused of viruses. I’ve been (A_)sick(_A) since 5days ago. I haven’t had a fever, but have had a sore throat and have felt tired. I went to see a doctor, and was diagnosed (B)as a cold that the symptom was just sore throat that caused of viruses. (A)時制 I’ve been caught a coldではなく、「風邪をひいた」というのは起こったことになるので”I’ve caught a cold”の時制になります。もしくは「ずっと病気です」なので”I’ve been sick”で「病気という状態が続いている」というのを表すことができます。 (B)表現の仕方 ここでは”diagnosed as a cold”で「風邪として診断された」というように”as”「として」を入れてあげる必要があります。
(C_)I was(_C) prescribed some antibiotics. I had done some event:at work, and private, lately. I was possibly tired. Luckily, I didn’t need to take off work (D)with it so far, (E)I need to take a rest during my two day off. (C_)He(_C) prescribed some antibiotics. I had done some event:at work, and private, lately. I was possibly tired. Luckily, I didn’t need to take off work (D)because of it so far, (E)so I need to take a rest during my two day off. (C)主語 ここで受動態で”I was prescribed”と表すのであれば、後ろに前置詞の”with”をつけて”I was prescribed with some antibiotics”になります。 (D)代替表現 ここでは”with”の代わりに”because of”を入れて「~のため」を表しています。 (E)接続詞 コンマだけで文章をつなぐことはできません。なので、ここでは何らかの接続詞を入れて文章をつなぐ必要があります。ここでは”so”を入れて「それで2日間の休みで休む必要がある」という文章の流れになります。
Still, I’m getting better today, (F)I’m thinking about going to drive just a little. It’s been rainy almost everyday lately. Meanwhile, it’s a precious sunny day. Still, I’m getting better today, (F)and I’m thinking about going to drive just a little. It’s been rainy almost everyday lately. Meanwhile, it’s a precious sunny day. (F)接続詞 |
提出時に質問した内容
I haven’t had a fever, but have had a sore throat and have felt tired. と書いてみましたが、文法的にあっているのかなと思うのとスッキリしない文章のような気がします。すみません、添削お願いします! |
頂いた回答
こんにちは。 質問にあったI haven’t had a fever, but have had a sore throat and have felt tiredの文は良いですが、過去完了形なので意味としては「喉が痛くて疲れた」という症状が過去にあって今はない、というニュアンスになります。もし今も「喉が痛くて疲れている」という症状があるのであれば”I have a sore throat and I am tired”の時制になります。 今回出てきた「ドライブに行く」というのは”go for a drive”で表すこともできます。 季節の変わり目で気温が下がってくるので、体調を壊しやすくなりますよね。週末で○○さんの風邪が治ると良いですね!お大事にしてください! |
今回忘れていけない箇所としては、一つ目が
I’ve been caught a cold. ではなく
I’ve caught a cold.
もしくは
I’ ve been sick.
二つ目がprescribeの用法として
I was prescribed with some antibiotics.
もしくは
He prescribed some antibiotics.
まだまだ初歩、道のりは長いです。